Queen of…something

I have an idea inspired by Mariah Carey (not a sentence I ever expected to write). She wants to be Queen of Christmas. She wanted to trademark that, even, but got denied. I don’t want to trademark anything, but I figure I can be Queen of…something. It’s just a matter of deciding what.

I am already Queen of my little Wordle group. We have a complicated way of figuring out who “wins” that means I rarely get to actually rule, but nevertheless, I’m Queen. It’s not really that satisfying though; I feel I need to expand my sphere of influence.

Maybe I can pick another holiday and be Queen of that. I would definitely steer clear of religious holidays. So what does that leave? Queen of the Fourth of July? That one at least seems like I’d only have to work one day a year, which is attractive. But I’d probably have to stay up late, given the expectation of fireworks. Hm. 

On the other hand, maybe I can be Queen of a concept, like “Breakfast” or “Kindness.” I’d have to choose pretty carefully though. Queen of Breakfast could be problematic on those days when I want to sleep in. Queen of Kindness would definitely not be a fit when I’m in a mood. Or hungry. Definitely not when I’m hungry.

Queens are usually associated with a geographic area. I don’t want to be Queen of an actual country. That seems to involve a lot of complicated rules about wearing hats. Not to mention people trying to take your picture and critiquing your wardrobe. No, not for me.

On the other hand, I could invent a country and say I’m Queen of that! I just need a made up name. They always seem to end in “a”, like Wakanda or Genovia. I could be Queen of Sowatia. Just swan around, expecting everyone to bow, but being gracious when they didn’t. Waving at folks in a friendly but not too enthusiastic manner. Looking askance at anyone who had the nerve to ask me to point out Sowatia on a map. 

And I could make up my own Queen rules. Anything I don’t want to do would be “Oh, I’m not permitted to [insert hideous task] due to my role as Queen of Sowatia.” Implying that if only I were free to throw off the burden of queenship, I’d be more than happy to babysit your twins. But alas. 

Oh! I could say “alas” a lot too! This idea has promise. Thanks, Mariah.